How Women Deny Themselves Their True Worth
“You have to make decisions that allow you to live in your worth… today.”
Three Women. Three Stories. One Common Thread.
Maria’s story:
She is a nurturer; both by nature and by profession. With over 30 years of serving others and putting her patients’ needs ahead of her own, Maria has become accustomed to never pouring into herself, financially and emotionally.
“My heart is generous by nature. If someone is in need I put them ahead of myself.”
Maria has been using her generosity as validation for why she isn’t fulfilling her own desires, telling herself that it’s perfectly fine if she doesn’t support herself, because she is so busy supporting others. She has a difficult time giving herself permission to even think about putting herself first.
Maria constantly feels like she is being tripped up and sadly, it’s her doing it to herself.
Angela’s story:
Angela holds a belief of “I’d rather be broke and happy than rich and miserable” which is rooted back to high school, and specifically, career day (the irony). Something stirred inside her to believe that if she was to pursue her passion of performing and theater, at least she would be happy, if not wealthy; and that sat perfectly fine with her through her early life. Until she became too broke to even pursue that passion.
She listened to her dad, came back to Canada and got an education.
A degree in Social Justice further reinforced her belief that this world is filled with greedy individuals and evil corporations who hold all the wealth and all the power. And in not wanting to contribute to capitalism and wasteful consumerism, she settled for a life of being broke but happy because that would make her a ‘better person’.
Truly what Angela wants is to have money and be happy but in her world the two can not exist together.
Beth’s story:
Beth got fired from her job and getting fired has made her feel like she has failed.
She passes off clearance rack purchases as having “scored a great deal”, but the truth is she doesn’t feel deserving of anything else. She wants to purchase a home with her partner but can’t see past her current situation which comes with an unsteady income and little to no savings in her bank account. She opts for a polish change at the salon because she doesn’t feel worthy of asking for a full manicure.
“I had an impressive job title, and I felt worthy of everything. I switched jobs and had a different, less impressive job title; suddenly I had lost my worth.”
Beth’s identity is tagged to her status and that status is what makes her feel worthy.
Until she can separate the two, she will always place her worth in how she sees herself today.
All three of these women are clients of mine, and their stories are real. And even though they have different backgrounds, ethnicities and even age groups, they all share one common thing; they deny their worth. In fact, most women have a very hard time stepping into their own worth.
Maybe you feel like your generosity defines your worth (like Maria); it doesn’t.
Or you believe being wealthy and being greedy are mutually exclusive (like Angela); they aren’t.
Does your current status define how worthy you feel (like Beth); it shouldn’t.
Your worth is independent of your circumstances and when you deny your worth, you deny your own abundance AND the money you desire deep down inside.
You are worthy just as you are. The only thing that defines your worth is how you see yourself. How many times do you look in the mirror and say “I’m worthy.”
Maybe you should start today.
PS. You are not alone on this journey to worthy. Join our Mint Worthy Community and be in the collective energy of financially empowered women, fearlessly going after their financial dreams and claiming their true worth.